on vanity
According to Time magazine, I'm on the forefront of a war. One that has been brewing for years, and one that I will have to fight for the rest of my life. The subject at the heart of this epic battle? Hair. Grey hair, to be exact.
That's right. In what I think it another example of the contiually lighter-and-flufflierness of Time's content, the magazine devoted several pages this week to a discussion of whether or not women should let their hair go grey. To be honest, I was very interested in this and flipped inside to read the article as soon as I saw the blurb on the cover.
The point of the article is, despite women's increasingly high-profile roles of power in our country, women "of a certain age" no longer let their hair turn grey. Hillary Clinton? Nancy Pelosi? Condoleeza Rice? All powerful women, all old enough to be silver-haired. But not a natural color to be seen among them. "Ironically, it's feminism's success that has driven today's widespread, virtually obligatory camouflage of gray hair," the article says. The general perception in our society seems to be that having grey hair somehow makes a woman appear outdated and frumpy, not stylish and professional.
This is of interest to me because ever since I became a mother three years ago, gray hairs have been popping out on my own head. Just a few, but they're still there. I despise them and pull them out whenever I notice them. As I've said before, grey hair makes me feel old, and I don't like that. Though I'm not ashamed of my age and I'm happy with where I am in my life, somehow I still want to look young and beautiful forever, and my vanity whispers to me that grey hair would detract from that. I look around at my friends, and most of them either dye their hair, or are not showing any grey yet.
Time gives credit to good home hair dyes for the non-greying of a generation of American women. But I've had bad luck with dying my hair at home out of a box, and getting a professional dye job every month or two is just more money than I'm willing to spend.
Plus, my husband doesn't want me to dye it. He likes the way I look, and thinks I'm foolish to pull out those grey hairs. He prefers a natural look, and doesn't want me to be, like Hillary or Nancy or Condi, a 50-something woman who still has the hair color of a 20-year-old. Of course he doesn't have a grey hair on his head, or even a hint of baldness, darn him.
So I'm not dying it. And eventually the hairs will get to be so numerous that I can't just pull them out. And then, apparently, I'll be one of the minority among my peers; the only grey-haired 30 or 40 year old around. But hopefully I'll learn to be okay with that. I like to feel attractive and I want my husband to like the way I look. But in the end, no matter how I try to fight time, it will keep taking its toll on "rosy lips and cheeks" (to quote my favorite sonnet) and other signs of youthfulness. No matter what I do, eventually any outer beauty I possess is going to fade. I just hope I can store up enough imperishable beauty in the hidden person of my heart to still be a truly attractive person when that time comes.
That's right. In what I think it another example of the contiually lighter-and-flufflierness of Time's content, the magazine devoted several pages this week to a discussion of whether or not women should let their hair go grey. To be honest, I was very interested in this and flipped inside to read the article as soon as I saw the blurb on the cover.
The point of the article is, despite women's increasingly high-profile roles of power in our country, women "of a certain age" no longer let their hair turn grey. Hillary Clinton? Nancy Pelosi? Condoleeza Rice? All powerful women, all old enough to be silver-haired. But not a natural color to be seen among them. "Ironically, it's feminism's success that has driven today's widespread, virtually obligatory camouflage of gray hair," the article says. The general perception in our society seems to be that having grey hair somehow makes a woman appear outdated and frumpy, not stylish and professional.
This is of interest to me because ever since I became a mother three years ago, gray hairs have been popping out on my own head. Just a few, but they're still there. I despise them and pull them out whenever I notice them. As I've said before, grey hair makes me feel old, and I don't like that. Though I'm not ashamed of my age and I'm happy with where I am in my life, somehow I still want to look young and beautiful forever, and my vanity whispers to me that grey hair would detract from that. I look around at my friends, and most of them either dye their hair, or are not showing any grey yet.
Time gives credit to good home hair dyes for the non-greying of a generation of American women. But I've had bad luck with dying my hair at home out of a box, and getting a professional dye job every month or two is just more money than I'm willing to spend.
Plus, my husband doesn't want me to dye it. He likes the way I look, and thinks I'm foolish to pull out those grey hairs. He prefers a natural look, and doesn't want me to be, like Hillary or Nancy or Condi, a 50-something woman who still has the hair color of a 20-year-old. Of course he doesn't have a grey hair on his head, or even a hint of baldness, darn him.
So I'm not dying it. And eventually the hairs will get to be so numerous that I can't just pull them out. And then, apparently, I'll be one of the minority among my peers; the only grey-haired 30 or 40 year old around. But hopefully I'll learn to be okay with that. I like to feel attractive and I want my husband to like the way I look. But in the end, no matter how I try to fight time, it will keep taking its toll on "rosy lips and cheeks" (to quote my favorite sonnet) and other signs of youthfulness. No matter what I do, eventually any outer beauty I possess is going to fade. I just hope I can store up enough imperishable beauty in the hidden person of my heart to still be a truly attractive person when that time comes.
4 comments:
Yay! Good for you. My husband feels the same way and I am so glad... although I haven't had any grey ones yet. :) I am sure it won't be fun but it is a part of life! ... till we get our heavenly bodies. who knows... maybe everyone will have grey hair in heaven! :) Keep seeking to be beautiful on the inside and you most definitely will continue to be beautiful on the outside!!
You are bolder than any of the women in my family, including me. My grandma and my mom color their hair blonde; I will certainly join their ranks. Call it inherited vanity :)
You are, and will always be, ridiculously attractive!
Hmmm...I have gone back and forth on this issue as well...to dye or not to dye, that is the question. I like the idea of being natural, and I like the idea of not being grey-are the two ideas compatible? Not likely. So, I have to be realistic with who I am...I am the girl who can hardly manage to get my hair trimmed before it really needs it, so maintaining hair color, I am not sure that is realistic for me. For now, I am just thankful for light colored hair, maybe when I do turn grey, it will just look like I finally got highlights...okay, not likely, I will probably just look washed out, but that is okay. And, truly, it is the inner beauty that really matters. The most externally beautiful woman is not beautiful if she has bad character.
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